Travel Notes on the USA
There are rocking chairs everywhere.


In 711 there is something called - Power Boost Coffee.


Old ladies will sit all day smoking at convenience store gambling machines.


There is salt, pepper and ketchup on every table.


People display personality by wearing funny socks.


You don't see station wagons anymore.


Culture exists to repeat the past and manipulate memory.


You might visit the grand opening of the local bank's new and advanced ATM.


Men dress everyday like they're going to war even if they're just going to pick up milk.


There are a zillion miles of frozen foods.


You'll see men watering their front lawns in the rain.


All men need pants with nine to twelve pockets.


People eat alone in their cars.


There are places to take your dog to get it washed.


There's a place in every town where the corporations live.


You probably went to high school with a local Realtor.


Someone you don't know will randomly call you "chief".


There are things named things like - American National.


Old women wear jeans.


Laundry mats look like shit.


Convenience stores look like shit.


At a retail store the clerk will ask - did you find everything OK?


Americans require monster trucks to survive in suburbia.


When you're in Wal Mart you might hear Benny and the Jets by Elton John.


At a gas station, when you're pumping your own gas, you might be forced to watch a video about the dumbest celebrity news.


America is the only place that exists.